Meet Rome Whittemore | Transgender Public Speaker and Founder of Rome Khalil

We had the good fortune of connecting with Rome Whittemore and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Rome, can you talk to us a bit about the social impact of your business?
The envision for Rome Khalil has been the impact that the world has towards the LGBTQIA+ community. We as people tend to see others for what we want to see them as which is okay. We all have different perspectives and were raised differently, however we were all also taught to be kind to one another. As kids we are taught to not hit other kids, or take things from them, or not make fun of someone. As we get older that changes due to many things. The social anxieties, the being accepted for what society sees as normal not realizing that normal isn’t so much of what we should be concentrating on. Normal, in fact isn’t even a true definition for society in my opinion because if we were all normal then we would all be the same and diversity and inclusion wouldn’t exist. Years ago we had segregation and there was many arguments, riots, and so on that eventually led to integration.

The negative views and outlooks we have on those who are different is causing for the segregation mindset to repeat however it’s not so much about color, but about sexual orientation and gender identity. The segregation that is becoming is focusing on the LGBTQIA+ community however more specifically the T, so lets talk the T for a moment. I myself am a Transgender Individual, who was born female and now identify as male. If I go to a grocery store or if I am offering to help someone, no one questions or wonders ” who does this guy sleep with” ” I am so concerned about what’s between his legs” or “he might try to change me to be like him”. What society sees, what that person sees, is another human being helping another human being. That’s the “T” I focus on with Rome Khalil.

I present at Estrella Mountain Community College to students and share my story openly with anyone who is willing to listen because many individuals have felt how I have. They have been mistreated, misunderstood, judged, disowned, and some even as far as abused, raped and killed. As you may have read in the prior interview with Voyage Phoenix, I was kicked out of my moms house and placed in her backyard with a tent and an extension cord because she found out prior to me transitioning to male that I was a lesbian. I lost a lot of time with my mother who was the only person I had in my life as I didn’t know my father or have siblings.

I never want someone to feel disowned or scared to be who they are. We shouldn’t seek approval from anyone but ourselves, however we should always seek respect. When I am in speaking my truth, I come from a point of love and respect. I ask for there to not be a stigma towards those who are different as no one would know I am transgender unless I tell them because I am fortunate enough to be “passing” or visually appealing as I like to call it. When someone sees a transgender woman they tend to judge them and say things about them or act different towards them because maybe they are early on in their transition, maybe they don’t want to go the full surgery and hormone route but wear clothes that make them feel comfortable. The looks, comments and stares are what I call not visually appealing because once again those thoughts, images are not “normal”

I was able to get a comment from a student that was in a class I presented to for a professor at ASU who is a good friend of mine. The student shall remain anonymous however they shared this after I presented to their class.

“Here’s one … For my second journal entry this week I wanted to reflect on the guest speaker we had in class on Monday September 21st. Rome’s story was so admirable, passionate, emotional and personal. His story was so touching that I had a hard time thinking about what I learned from it during the Q&A. I wish I could have compiled my thoughts more quickly so that I could commented on his story. For this reason I would like to jot down a couple things I learned or took away from Rome’s speech. For starters the first thing I took away was the importance or impact of both unhealthy and healthy relationships. Rome’s poor relationship with his ( I apologize if this is the incorrect pronoun) mom was saddening due to her unaccepting nature. But, at the same time, their relationship to me was very touching when you realize how far Rome has come and how strong he is. If I were in Rome’s position I don’t think I could help myself from being the smallest bit thankful. The part of their relationship I can relate to is the passing away of a parent. Although Rome’s mom could have been more accepting for the first 17 years, the past is in the past and it’s not something that can be changed, in my opinion it has all happened for a reason. Similarly in my life, my dad has recently passed away. Although I had a great relationship with my dad, I find that in the grieving process I tend to wish I had spent more time with him or that I didn’t argue with him as much as I did. I have to remind myself often that thinking these things do not help me. Instead I have to realize that the time and years I had with him was the amount of time he needed to teach me and the amount of time I needed to learn from him. In all, his speech has helped me realize that relationships with parents are so so important and should be cherished more than I think most people recognize. I am very sorry for Rome’s loss. Another aspect about writing in general that I took from his speech was the concept of not only being personal but emotional. I didn’t realize how connected you can get to a reader when you can sense the struggles and emotion through both the writing and their voice. This taught me that although we are writing research papers, it’s still important to include some personal and emotional aspects to intrigue the readers. Overall, I am very thankful to have heard Rome’s story and on top of that im glad I was able to take away some meaningful lessons from his meaningful journey.”

I shared this students comment because it really highlighted what the purpose of Rome Khalil is. This isn’t just about my name, or me big transgender. It’s about bringing back humanity even if it Is a little at a time, because every step matters. I always say empowerment > Embarrassment = Equality. If we can empower one another to embrace one another then the embarrassment factor is gone. The judgment factor can be gone. The acceptance of who we are as individuals, the compassion, the empathy, the humanity can take one more step forward to being equal.

Alright, so for those in our community who might not be familiar with your business, can you tell us more?
Rome Khalil focuses on the reality and everyday life and struggles of a transgender individuals journey There is no set agenda to change perspectives but to respect perspectives. To be able to have different view points and at the end realize we’re human. To share the differences between a cisgendered individual and a transgender individual. There are no scripts, it’s all raw and in real time with real answers. I strive to leave every interaction with at least 1 person willing to see a different perspective or being able to provide perspective and resources and support to those who may have family, friends, coworkers, or even themselves who are transitioning

I was fortunate enough get started in this business because I met a person who needed help to help with a computer issue who just so happened to work for a college. The college needed a speaker for their classes who could bring an in person experience, and Q and A after the students read the book LUNA.

I want the world to know that my brand is me and I am my brand. Even in our differences we can find similarities and use those to bring a better understanding of communication of unknown topics, such as LGBTQIA+ and more specifically my favorite. The “T” for transgender topics to the world.

Let’s say your best friend was visiting the area and you wanted to show them the best time ever. Where would you take them? Give us a little itinerary – say it was a week long trip, where would you eat, drink, visit, hang out, etc.
I would have to take my friend to slide rock for sure. Absolutely one of the best times and nothing that is extreme yet its relaxing and enjoyable. I would also have to take them to melrose on 7th to see the rainbow crosswalk and also enjoy a good cigar and drink at Sazerac. Then we would make sure to hit up a good drag show at BS West. We would also go to Dominicks steakhouse in Scottsdale for some amazing mouthwatering food. Before the trip ends we would go to Antelope canyon also as it has some amazing views!

Who else deserves some credit and recognition?
I have to give a huge shout out first to myself as selfish as that may seem haha. I am proud of myself for accepting who I am and taking care of me so that I may share my journey and spread some positivity and insight.

Secondly, I have to give a huge shout out to Eddie Berenes, Sam Waters, Felix Sanchez, Raquel Balderas, Mariela Castro, April Covert, Jennifer Jones, Albert Musick, Lynda Andrade, Olivia Tejada, Jim Lowbrera, and Brandon Coulter for all the support when I came out as Transgender.

I want to thank all the schools and organizations that I have spoke for or been present in, ION Magazine, Phoenix Pride, Voyage Phoenix Magazine, ASU, Estrella Mountain Community College.

Lastly, I need to thank my daughter Alazara who is 8yrs old for loving me as her dad and going through this journey with me. Love you Popeye Face!

Finally, my loving Fiancé Nikki for accepting me as not only a person, but accepting me as a transgender individual and not seeing my scars but seeing through my scars. I Love you!

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Linkedin: linkedin.com/in/romekhalil