We had the good fortune of connecting with Chinasa Okafor and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Chinasa, as a parent, what have you done for you children that you feel has had the most significant impact?

This is a very interesting question. Five years ago, my first child was 6 years old, while my second child was 3 years old. At that time, we were living in Nigeria where we had access to affordable caregivers. I usually left my home for work (I worked in the bank) as early as 6am and returned at 8pm. During the month end pressure, I left my office at 12 midnight only to leave home very early again for work. This implies that I literally handed the training and up-bringing of my children to the caregiver who did not have the capacity to handle such responsibilities. I came home one day, and it felt like my first child had literally grown up without me instilling in her any of my values. This awakening made me to reflect and determine how I could change my current situation. I decided to pray about it and ask for real directions as we were a two-income household which implied that my husband and I had to work hard at it to keep the finances going.

On the day that I reached a decision to change my job role from Operation to Marketing, I recall my husband asking me to write 10 pros and cons for him regarding my desire to switch my role in the bank (I guess he wanted to be very certain that it was not an emotional decision) being mindful that I have never held a Marketing role in my entire Banking Career. At this time, all I had in mind was being able to spend quality time with my kids. I did not take into consideration the pressure that will come with the new marketing role. When I finally got the marketing role, my life turned upside down. I was sent to a branch that was 500 miles away from home and you dare not leave home late as the traffic situation where I lived (Lagos, Nigeria) was terrible and second to none. At this time, I was pregnant with my third baby (about 7 months gone) and my situation was “chaotic”. I would wake up at 3am to get my home ready and will not return until 9pm. All my hope of being more available for my kids were dashed. I cried almost every day on my way to work. To crown it all, I had a “mean” boss who was new to the branch and needed to prove himself to his colleagues. Since I was his new subordinate, he made sure I did not rest. The pressure was so much on me that I considered returning to my old unit. I went as far as scheduling an interview to go back to my previous role in operation as I felt that it was better than the distance and the pressure that I had to deal with. The only thing that kept me going at that time was my faith in God which grew ever stronger with every passing moment. I had no idea that this new faith that I found in our Lord was having its impact on my husband and kids.

A lot of times, I thought of resigning, quitting, throwing in the towel and just giving up. A mentor once told me during this trying time that “diamonds are not sort after because they are diamonds but because they go through a furnace.” I quickly realized that this “hot” furnace that I was going through was God’s own way of preparing me for what he had in store for me and my family.

Honestly, I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel during this time, but I kept at it with grace. I had to go away to deliver my baby and took about 3 months off work. It was definitely a huge relief to take the break from the pressure of the commuting distance. I got this huge breakthrough when I opened about 23 juicy accounts in the branch. This started my performance recognition. I had no idea I was resilient and persistent. As soon I delivered on the numbers, I noticed that the pressure immediately eased off a bit. Unfortunately, I still had to travel to work. Thankfully, on one fateful day, my husband came by the office and asked me to go out with him. Little did I know it was for me to see our new home which was 10 mins away from work. I was elated. I was over the moon (you can imagine my excitement). Thankfully, we moved closer to work as soon as possible and I no longer had to rush off to work and come home late anymore. It was like a dream come true. I could do school runs, visit my kids’ school for any and every activity and even go home for lunch.

I made the effort to be more present with my kids and I saw the effect and impact this had on them. For instance, my first child who was 8 years old at the time wrote a note to a boy in her class and she first showed me the note before anyone else, which was a teachable moment for my daughter and me. This may seem insignificant but to me it was not because it had proven that my daughter and I had formed a bond and a strong friendship within the period that I was available at home. I was very grateful for our friendship. Today, she is 11 years old, and she is literally my younger sister as we continue to build on our relationship. Thus far, there have been many teachable moments.


The Shoutout series is all about recognizing that our success and where we are in life is at least somewhat thanks to the efforts, support, mentorship, love and encouragement of others. So is there someone that you want to dedicate your shoutout to?

My shoutout goes to first and foremost my creator, who did not give up on me but waited patiently for his child to find her path back to him.

To my husband, who also has been patient with me all these years and solidly my rock in good times and in bad.

To my Kids, I will keep striving to be a better mom to you all.

To Nkechi Asogwa, she held me by the hand those years of turbulence and indecisiveness. Your prayers and advise helped to navigate to the shore.

To My mentor and friend Emmanuel Ekong, your silence when I had to rant and vent to you was very helpful. You always had the right words

Instagram: hempworx_hempsgift

Linkedin: linkedin.com/in/chinasa-okafor

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